From darkness to light
Glory to Allah (swt) (God), the Lord of honour and power! (He is free) from what they ascribe (to him), and peace on the Apostles and peace and thanks to Allah (swt) (God), the Lord and cherisher of the world. Allah (swt) (God) gave man the privilege of a free will, it is man’s duty to keep it pure and attain salvation, contaminate it with sin or reach perdition.
A. L. R. A Book which We have revealed unto thee, in order that thou mightest lead mankind out of the depths of darkness into light – by the leave of their Lord – to the Way of (Him) the Exalted in power, worthy of all praise!- 014:001
Allah (swt) (God) is sending us a very important message here, if we should become trapped in the devil’s clutches as our parents (Adam and Eve) did, and we follow their pattern, by observing sincere repentance then we will be able to get out from the darkness of sin. There is one very important way in which will help us obtain Allah’s (God) forgiveness.
If we willfully hurt someone’s feelings we should first ask them forgiveness, before seeking Allah’s (swt) forgiveness.
Those who annoy Allah and His Messenger – Allah has cursed them in this World and in the Hereafter, and has prepared for them a humiliating Punishment. 033:057
And those who annoy believing men and women undeservedly bear (on themselves) a calumny and a glaring sin.033:058
Indeed Allah (swt) (God) is very strict in His warnings. I will give an example from this short story of the importance of asking forgiveness from those you have hurt, before repenting to Allah (swt) (God).
Repentance and Amendment
There was once a very kind and gentle sister named Tadira. She had three envious brothers. These brothers had in their poisoned minds that their little sister would deprive them of things since she was the only daughter. (This is the work of the devil).
They were jealous of her, and they tormented her daily. One day the brothers invited her to join them for a spin on their new boat; she was very happy and readily accepted. As they continued driving in the ocean Tadira noticed they were very far out and the water was getting very rough. She began to feel afraid; she said “I think we should go back.” They told her to shut up and asked her why she was afraid of the ocean? They said to her “You put up with much worse from us and you survive. If the boat should sink, do you think you could survive?” She said “That is up to Allah (swt) (God) to decide.” She now started to feel that her brothers were up to some sort of mischief, and so she said to them “Put fear into your hearts for the punishment of Allah (swt) (God) and seek His forgiveness for all your wrong doings.” They told her that they prayed everyday like her and that they do seek Allah’s (swt) forgiveness. She then said “But you have never asked for my forgiveness for all the grief and wrong that you have done to me; Allah (swt) (God) will never forgive or answer your prayers until you seek forgiveness from the people that you hurt. Even though I was never wrong to you, I always sought forgiveness from all of you, before seeking forgiveness from Allah (swt) (God). This is the main reason why Allah (swt) (God) is guiding and giving me strength to cope patiently through all the oppression that you have all caused me.” They laughed at her and said “Okay let’s see if you are right about what you just said. If you are right, then we will ask you forgiveness.” They then lifted her and threw her into the ocean. She shouted at them “Repent now before it is too late!” They ignored her and turned the boat around and said “We are safe in the boat.” She shouted at them to come back for her, but they kept their faces straight and headed for the shore. She shouted again “Remember what goes around comes around! Don’t you think the same way that you threw me into this ocean that Allah (swt) (God) can do the same to you?” They thought for a minute and then answered “We have done a lot of wrong to you, and nothing has ever happened to us. What makes you think it will happen now?” She replied “Everything has its limit and you are over stepping yours. If you pull me out of the water now, and seek Allah’s (swt) (God) forgiveness and mine as well, He will forgive you. The eldest brother shouted “Enough of this!” He turned the boat and headed full speed towards her, with the intention of startling her. He laughed mockingly and sped away. Shortly after another boat came by and rescued her. As they were heading towards the shore, they saw a boat overturned in the water. As they approached the boat Tadira recognized it was her brother’s boat, but no one was around. They searched around the boat for a while but didn’t see anyone, so they continued heading for shore. A little further up, Tadira saw her three brothers hanging onto a floating log, and she heard them shouting! O Allah (swt) (God) forgive us, we were indeed wrong. She asked the driver to rescue them. As they got closer Tadira’s younger brother saw her, and he said “O! My sister, please forgive me for I was indeed wrong to you.” She grabbed hold of his arm and pulled him safely into the boat. Then she tried to rescue her other two brothers, but at that very instant a huge wave came and crashed over them. They were nowhere to be seen. She cried out for them and searched the area but failed to find them. By Allah’s (swt) grace, only the one that sought her forgiveness was saved.
The lessons and the examples from this short story:
- We manage to grasp the understanding of evil scheming and plotting. Also ungratefulness has no good ending.
- The importance of seeking forgiveness from those that we have hurt, before seeking Allah (swt) (God) forgiveness.
- The pain and anguish that envy and jealously can cause.
- How goodness always prevails over evil.
These three brothers were very arrogant and cruel to their kind hearted sister. The great root of evil is hate, arrogance, and disloyalty. It leads to ill conduct and therefore should be treated with patience, wisdom, and understanding. As Allah (swt) (God) tells us in the Holy Qur’an 004:034
Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given the one more (strength) than the other, and because they support them from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient, and guard in (the husband’s) absence what Allah would have them guard. As to those women on whose part ye fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (Next), refuse to share their beds, (And last) beat them (lightly); but if they return to obedience, seek not against them Means (of annoyance): For Allah is Most High, great (above you all).
Mentioned also in Chapter 64 verse 14:
O ye who believe! Truly, among your wives and your children are (some that are) enemies to yourselves: so beware of them! But if ye forgive and overlook, and cover up (their faults), verily Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.
Why is it so important for men to take these three steps against their disloyal and unfaithful wives?
- Admonish them
- Refuse to share their bed
- Beat them (lightly)
- Not forgetting the warning from Chapter 64 verse 14: To beware of them.
These steps should be taken to discipline the wife in order to changer her behaviour. The husband should try to help his wife to come out from darkness and enter into spiritual light. We can see how merciful Allah (swt) (God) is, He did not order drastic actions, or order cruel actions like some men take against their wives in situations of disloyalty.
(Indeed two wrong does not make a right).
Love means devotion, loyalty, and duty, if the men act right and his wife listens to him, and changes her indecent behaviour, then his reward will be very fruitful for him, his kith and kin in this world and the hereafter.
A man becomes a sinner if he tries to cover his wife’s faults, and is unjust to people who try to warn him, or who try to stop the sins from his wife’s actions from spreading, for these sins would bring shame and corruption to the husband, wife, and their respective families. For tumult and oppression are worse than slaughter (Chapter 2 Verse 191). To oppress people through injustice, cause pain and grief, Allah (swt) (God) tells us in Chapter 17 verse 9: Verily this Qur’an doth guide to that which is most right (or stable), and giveth the Glad Tidings to the Believers who work deeds of righteousness, that they shall have a magnificent reward;w
As I understand, righteousness can be achieved by fighting against evil and not for it. Fighting to cover up one’s evil actions such as: oppression and injustice to the people who are trying to save you from humiliation, is deliberately ungrateful, and an unjust life has no stability. The relationship between a husband and wife that has no trust and jealousy would only lead to conflict and corruption. If one of them does not take control and enforce good conduct, then the conduct in their lives will be filled with conflict. These non-stop feuds may end up destroying innocent people’s lives.
o say that you love someone and in trying to please that person, by causing injustice to others, your love is fraudulent, it is not love but selfishness.
Allah (swt) (God) tells us in Chapter 66 verse 6:
O ye who believe! Save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is Men and Stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe, who flinch not (from executing) the Commands they receive from Allah, but do (precisely) what they are commanded. 066:006
We are told to carefully guard not only our own conduct, but the conduct of our families, and of all who are near and dear to us, and if we fail to do so through our unselfish love for them, then we are false in our love for them. This little parable may help one to see my points clearly Insha Allah.
If someone (shaitaan) lights a man’s house on fire and his wife is trapped in the fire, and he is fully aware of this fact but he totally ignores it, and the fire starts to get out of control and people begin to notice it and they alert him but he begins to fight with them after they have alerted him, then how can he claims to say that he loves his wife? Clearly it is not sincere love.
The meaning here is the wife became trapped into the devil’s clutches and the husband did nothing to prevent it, or to pull her out. The husband’s wrong actions only added fuel to an already blazing fire which is now out of control. In situations like this there will always be conflict and feud in one’s family, because of the man’s wrong judgments and of his conduct, he will always be in a rage and haste, as they say; The smoke from a flame is sometimes worse than the flame itself. Living with an unjust and dishonest wife is like living in a ball of thick black smoke, imagine a little smoke from a single cigarette and the harm it does to you. For sure this is certainly not healthy and you would always be in frustration and anger. It does not matter how much wealth and position you have, or how much you pray, or how much good deeds you do, nothing will bring happiness to your mind, there will be no peace or unity in your home and amongst your kith and kin, until you exercise justice.
No kind of calamity can occur, except by the leave of Allah: and if any one believes in Allah, (Allah) guides his heart (aright): for Allah knows all things. 064:011
Our own conduct of wrongdoings and injustice can cause us and other innocent people a mountain high of pain and grief, since every action have its own inevitable consequences.
Sincere love for Allah (swt) (God) and strong fear for His punishment is the highest motive of our conduct, for it leads us to good and sincere actions in this life. We will be able to see clearly any wrong actions that are taking place in our homes and we will be able to act with justice before things get out of control, when we are frustrated and miserable we start to fight and blame everyone around us for our mistakes and wrong judgment.
We fail in our duty to Allah (swt) (God) if we tolerate wrong regardless of who it is or allowing it to run rampage, when we could have prevented it. Our wrong conduct can easily bring the consequences of humiliation, sorrow, persecution, oppression, wickedness, betrayal, arrogance and evil. We not only become an enemy to ourselves but also to all those who we love. Even prayers and giving charity will not help us here. What will help us is making amendments and repentance, if you do not do this you will always be in utter despair and misery, and you will have no one else to blame but yourself.
Our worst enemy is within ourselves. Misery, selfish ways and covetousness, leads to envy, and jealousy. Our actions and our conduct from these categories will cause us to live an evil and unjust life. This will not only bring suffering upon ourselves, but suffering to those who we try to inflict pain and grief on. Trying to destroy someone’s status that Allah (swt) (God) put them in is nothing more than envy. Our actions here are false.
Allah (swt) (God) can turn our weaknesses into strength if we make amends and repent sincerely from our hearts. This will lead us to righteous virtues which will then lead us to good, success and bliss.
To those who believe and do deeds of righteousness hath Allah promised forgiveness and a great reward. 005:009
Those who reject faith and deny our signs will be companions of Hell-fire. 005:010
O ye who believe! Turn to Allah with sincere repentance: In the hope that your Lord will remove from you your ills and admit you to Gardens beneath which Rivers flow,- the Day that Allah will not permit to be humiliated the Prophet and those who believe with him. Their Light will run forward before them and by their right hands, while they say, “Our Lord! Perfect our Light for us, and grant us Forgiveness: for Thou hast power over all things.”066:008.
It is fraudulent to live with hate and dishonesty; it leads to evil and wicked plots.
Secret counsels are only (inspired) by the Evil One, in order that he may cause grief to the Believers; but he cannot harm them in the least, except as Allah permits; and on Allah let the Believers put their trust.058:010.
Our good actions are but vain, we cannot live a dual life (good and evil) for then we make ourselves hypocrites.
See Qur’an: 063:001-011 & 004-142.
It is mentioned in Al-Qur’an 009:023:
O ye who believe! take not for protectors your fathers and your brothers if they love infidelity above Faith: if any of you do so, they do wrong.
One may ask What if they love both faith and infidelity. Then their good and bad actions make them fall under the category of hypocrites, and therefore we are not to keep close with them until they repent and purify themselves from sin.
If we have a member in our family who sadly falls into this category of adultery, regardless of how much we love them, we cannot support them in their wrongful conduct. Our love will not do them any justice but it will give them the encouragement to plunge deeper and deeper into their evil habits. We can also become spiritually blind by keeping company with them. They are fire and the smoke from a fire which can cause blindness, then we become like them or worse. A blind man cannot lead someone to their destination so therefore the amount of confusion they have in their lives would be equivalent to the height of a mountain. Allah (swt) (God) would smoothly distance the one who was sincerely trying to stand up for justice in the corrupted family.
There are Angels in succession to guard each person by Allah’s (swt) commands; it is not too late to get Allah’s (swt) protection from the shaitaan’s way. Make the effort to seek forgiveness from Allah (swt) and you certainly will receive His protection.
Allah does not change a people’s lot unless they change what is in their hearts. 013:011
Consider these few lessons seriously:
- Pay attention to those things that are good, remove those that are evil.
And establish regular prayers at the two ends of the day and at the approaches of the night: For those things, that are good remove those that are evil: Be that the word of remembrance to those who remember (their Lord): 011:114
- Remember the words of advice from those who are righteous.
- Keep company with the people who sincerely obey Allah (swt) (God) and His Apostles.
All who obey Allah and the messenger are in the company of those on whom is the Grace of Allah,- of the prophets (who teach), the sincere (lovers of Truth), the witnesses (who testify), and the Righteous (who do good): Ah! what a beautiful fellowship! 004:069
- Keep together in your noble brotherhood: share its joy and sorrow with loving support, strive and fight with firm faith against evil, exercise kindness, patience and mercy, for this life is short while the hereafter is eternal.
- Protect yourself and your loved ones against hypocrites. Keep away from those people whose very look reminds you of the hell-fire, or pain and grief.
- Give respect to the people whose looks reminds you of Paradise and whose looks reflects good and sincere actions. Allah (swt) (God) said: Then those who believe in Allah, and hold fast to Him,- soon will He admit them to mercy and grace from Himself, and guide them to Himself by a straight way. 004:175.
- Women must hold their honour and dignity in a very respectful way which will be pleasing to Allah (swt) (God), if they make a dazzling display of themselves and of their beauty, then their conduct will be displeasing to Allah (swt) (God) and very pleasing to the Shaitaan.
If ye loan to Allah, a beautiful loan, He will double it to your (credit), and He will grant you Forgiveness: for Allah is most Ready to appreciate (service), Most Forbearing, – 064:017.
Our loan to Allah (swt) (God) means love, respectful behaviour and being ready to serve justice by helping others in their distress, being kind, and being just to your kith and kin and your neighbours.
O! Allah (swt) (God), in Thee we put our Trust and to Thee we turn in repentance. Inna Allaha yuhibbu almuqsiteena Allah loves those who are just. Allah (swt) is most merciful to the people who show mercy. Ameen.